Tag Archives: beats ahoy boat cruise

Green Velvet Rocks the Boat @ Beats Ahoy

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 Footage and photos by Frankenräver

          On May 27th, some lucky party people boarded the River Gambler and set forth on Beats Ahoy courtesy of Activate-Footwork. Green Velvet presiding over the decks. Manzone and Strong, Addy, The Junkies, Evan G, Jonathan Rosa and Robb G were also in attendance. Despite the tantalizing lineup, Beats Ahoy was not packed, perhaps due to the rather exorbitant ticket price ($50), considering we’re in a recession and all.  

However, the draconian antics of Fortress Security was a disgrace to mature partygoers. The security bitches practically raped the contents of my purse, turning up condoms, ditching my stash AND my gummy bears in the bin and trying to prevent me from bringing peanuts on board (tha nerve!!!). Fortunately, her supervisor said I could bring snacks onboard as long as they were sealed. My friend was then subjected to an excessively stringent 10 minute search, during which they chucked his hand lotion. Apparently they weren’t satisfied they couldn’t find anything suspicious on a black man, so they made him remove his baseball cap twice. Quite frankly, I’m surprised they didn’t make him strip right down to his socks. Conclusion: having to work security on a Sunday sucks ass, so why not make things difficult for the peeps who are having fun? In the future, Footwork should consider hiring a far more courteous security team, if they care anything about ensuring a positive experience for patrons.       

The crowd was a refreshingly wonderful contrast compared to the commercially drab Glow party debacle at The Guvernment the night before. Peeps who know how to party, with love and respect, looking out for one another – PLUR in effect. It was great seeing some graduates from the Class of ’99 reprazentin. Kudos to the male security guard for not giving me a hard time as I barfed ginger ale over the side of the boat. And when Green Velvet came on, well…it was smooth sailing all the way. He even joked about the weather, saying everytime he comes to Toronto, they say it’s going to rain but it never does. As a matter of fact, the weather held up beautifully all day long. Of course GV made a huge splash when he performed his hit, “La La Land”, with the boat rocking wildly as enthusiastic ravers jumped up and down, really getting into the swing of things. Evan G and others kept things going on the lower deck, though not much action was happening down there. My baby powder would’ve been perfect to get some footwork happening on the concrete floor. Thank God I forgot to bring it, else Fortress Security might have thought I was trying to smuggle meth on board and trashed it. Green Velvet was the perfect gentleman; surprisingly humble, approachable and kind. “Hi, my name is Curtis”, he said as I introduced myself. He willingly posed for pictures and chatted with adoring fans. After five hours, the River Gambler returned to harbour and the party was over. Upon the suggestion of my friends, I went to the bin and lo and behold – my stash was sitting there, waiting for me.  I didn’t have to look far. There is justice in the universe after all.  

 

Copyright © 2012 Frankie Diamond. All rights reserved. Excerpts of less than 200 words may be published to another site, including a link back to the original article. This article may not be reproduced in its entirety and posted to another site without the express permission of the author.

 

 

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